Multiculturalism Gone Awry

I believe our government was and should be driven by enlightenment Ideals and rationalism. However, over the last several years it seems like an ever-increasing element of our society wants to bring a theocracy to American. This trend is also extending throughout the world. European cultures have been bowing to pressures from those who, under the guise of multicultural principles, want the government to accept religious tolerance, which often violates what we have determined as basic human rights. In America, we have adopted Christian holidays, placed God’s name in the pledge of allegiance and adopted “in God we trust” on its currency. We require those who have been adjudicated to attend uniquely Christian programs. We give tax moneys to “faith-based” programs who have a specific religious agenda. Additionally, we have those exempting out of educational classes, mandatory immunizations, and other programs for religious reasons that are designed for the betterment of society. While some exemptions are justified, some place all of us at risk and often dumb down America.
In other countries, governments are swallowing religious tolerance to restrain investigations and allegations of child abuse, domestic violence and other forms of emotional, physical and sexual abuse. Why are we allowing religious communities to force women to wear absurdly restrictive clothing, marry off young girls, use harsher cultural and religiously accepted forms of discipline? How far do we allow parents to indoctrinate their children on the fear of science, rationalism and working toward the best for a society?
We are moving back to the dark ages where radical religious groups using their own interpretation of religious holy books will rule the world.

Love is more than Tolerance

Love is more than tolerating someone. Love is acceptance of their beliefs, views and differences. Love values the individual. Love sees the weaknesses of the individual but they are overshadowed by their recognition of their strengths. Christian love does not hate people who disagree with them. They look past people's differences and love the human being.
Christian Hypocrisy is when a person believes they are better than another human being. Christian hypocrisy believes they cannot share company or fellowship with someone who disagrees with them on issues. They try to change others. They pray for their conversion. They push to make their community and country more like them. They are right and others are wrong. Period. Everything is black and white and they believe they always wear the white hat. Christian hypocrites see everyone else's sin but cannot see their own pride which is detestable to God.

Galileo and the Heavens

It has been almost 400 years to the day that Galileo Galilei fist observed the moons of Jupiter and other astronomical phenomena, which would change the world forever. His findings resulted in a solar system instead of an earth system formerly believed. He was tried and found to be a heretic, a title he held until October 13 1992, when Pope John Paul II expressed regret for how the Galileo affair was handled, and officially conceded that the Earth was not the center of the universe. In March 2008 the Vatican proposed to complete its rehabilitation of Galileo by erecting a statue of him inside the Vatican walls. Why was this finding so controversial? In today’s world if we discover something new we all are marveled, but at that time such knowledge was seen as a direct contradiction to the scriptures. If the bible was right, then Galileo must be wrong; if Galileo was right, then the bible must be wrong.
Of course, we now know that Galileo was right. This knowledge is beyond question. Therefore, people’s view of the bible had to change. Either, they had to accept that the bible was wrong or they had to change their view on hermeneutics and exegesis. Nevertheless, why were Galileo’s findings so controversial?
I have been doing some thinking and I believe it primarily rests not on a verse or two but on the overall view espoused in the bible. This view was spoken repeatedly that the space above the clouds is where the Heavens are. The Heavens was a physical place. Elijah road a chariot of fire into the heavens – this was not a spiritual event, this was a spacecraft heading into the clouds where God was thought to reside. When Jesus ascended, he did it in a physical body. He went into the air and up to God. The rapture is another example. Jesus, in his super physical body, will come down from heaven and our physical bodies will rise up to meet him in the clouds. This is a physical ascension and resurrection.
Now, I see why the church was so threatened by Galileo’s findings. His telescope should have found God, and he was nowhere to be found. Galileo not only didn’t see God or his angels around the earth, he also discovered that the earth was not the center of the world. If the earth was not special, then maybe Mankind wasn’t either. Later, with Isaac Newton’s findings, the world now did not even need God to control it. Prior to Newton, God was busy making everything happen. While Galileo and others took away God’s direct involvement on the earth, with rain, earthquakes and other “acts of God”, Newton found the universe, as a whole, as self-regulating. God wasn’t supernaturally keeping the planets and stars in the heavens anymore, there was physical laws that accounted for that phenomena now. These revelations and the emerging scientific method would bring about the deism movement espoused by many of our nation’s founding fathers. Deism is a philosophical belief in the existence of a God on the basis of reason, and observation of the natural world alone. Deist held that God made the world then left it to handle itself through natural laws. They did not believe in special or divine revelation of God believed by Christians.

Therapists Missing Fingers

I was just thinking back on earlier days. I remember taking “shop” in elementary school, Jr. High and Senior High. It seems that times have changed because it was mandatory for boys to take these classes and girls were required to talk home economics and other cooking or sewing classes. One thing I specifically remember was how nearly every one of my shop teachers was missing a finger. I hope this wasn’t a requirement but it was often the case. This got me thinking about credentials. Would a shop teacher be a better safety instructor after losing a finger or a poor role model for children? What if he or she lost more than one finger in separate incidents? Would that take away the person’s credibility more?
I wanted to relate this metaphor to counselors. Life experience is a great teacher and can help make a good counselor even better. I believe a shop teacher that has experienced the bite of a buzz saw usually becomes an advocate of stricter safety standards. I also believe that counselors who experience many of life difficulties and learn from them, often become the best therapists. Those who have been sheltered from life’s struggles in their own life, often become prideful and unable to relate to other human beings. We can learn from the mistakes of others, which is a good way to go, but there is something about us as humans that still needs to learn through our own experience. However, we should learn the first time and not go back to the same old behavior.
I cannot imagine sending my son or daughter to a shop teacher who has several fingers missing from several incidents. This would indicate to me that this teacher does not learn from their mistakes and may not be able to help others from their experience. Touching a hot stove once, helps us learn; continuing to touch the hot stove is incompetence. Unfortunately, I see counselors that continue to put their hand in the saw without learning some of life’s important lessons. Therapists should be experts in human relationships and communication. They should know the correlation between cause and effect and how one’s actions, whether positive or negative, always result in a consequence.
This relates to so many areas of therapist competence. Although, I believe I am a good addiction counselor without having had a particular drug addiction myself, I believe many individuals who have had a problem in the past can make excellent counselors. However, those who remain in “recovery” forever and continue to struggle need to step away from the field of counseling. I can see a how a divorced counselor could still be an effective marriage and family therapist, however, if this person has a divorce, after a divorce, after a divorce, their credibility becomes questionable. Soon, the counselor can cut off so many fingers that they lose their integrity with their clients or their stubs for hands leave so many scars that they are more focused on themselves and their recovery that their effectiveness with others is limited.

To blog or not to blog (about family stuff)

My blog is a record of some of my thoughts. You do not need to agree with them. Please comment on them and give me an alternative perspective. I am willing to change. I seek the truth. I desire knowledge and wisdom to behave responsibly. I like debate and those willing to engage me intellectually.
One thing that I have struggled with in my current pursuit of truth is working through my own past. My experiences are interwoven with others of my family and friends. It is never my attempt to hurt anyone’s feelings through personal reflections of the past. However, I want to also be honest in my writing and not have personal and family secrets. I am blatantly honest. This means that I may express my feelings and interpret the past actions of my family and friends, which they may find offensive. Yet, I am torn between two extremes. I see the positives and negatives of my own behavior and I also see the same in family members. If I talk about a negative trait or belief of a family member, it does not mean that I do not see their positive traits or that I have lost my love for them. I dearly love my family but I also hope they respect my own views. I have been told that my views are wrong and that I'm sending my own children to hellfire; yet, I respect their opinions and understand their perspectives. I ask for the same respect. Please allow me to write about how, for instance, I may see my grandfather on my mother’s side as a child abuser and a tyrant, but I also can see another side of him. Yet, I believe it is important to evaluate this life and how my mother and I were influenced by the heritage he left. I want to be honest about him and others and I do not want to wait until people are dead before I can do my own assessment and share my own feelings with my family, students and others I feel may benefit from this information. I could only share the happy and uncomplicated times of my life, but this is dishonest with others and myself. I like to talk about these but I also want to explore times of personal struggles. If someone can help me in my quest for balance, please feel free to share.

Christian Faith vs. Muslim Faith pt.1

I just received a phone call criticizing me for statements from my blog of March 18. I understand this criticism. To associate Christian parental training with extremist Muslim indoctrination seems unfair, radical and almost hateful. Yet, I have even stacked the deck with the way the last statement was worded and the culture in which it was presented. The truth is that most parents, Christian and Muslim, want the best for their children. They want their children to follow the commands of God as written in their scriptures. They want their children to seek after the eternal values and not worldly desires. They want them to be men and women of faith and to be willing to defend their faith even if it means martyrdom. Interestingly, they also use the same arguments to defend their own faith and dismiss others.
There are some differences in my opinion. First, I do believe that Christians in this century like to follow the God from the Sermon on the Mount and not the God of the Old Testament. They have developed elaborate doctrines, such as dispensationalism, to separate Jesus, the God of Love, from the God of wrath, vengeance, jealousy, hate (I can give verses to back up statements, if needed) and more, of the Old Testament. One thing about Christianity is that we Christians can find solace in large parts of the Bible and be illiterate or ignore other parts, which shows another side of God. Muslims find very little of love and tolerance from the Koran. Christians can look to the New Testament for elements of tolerance of differing views and ignore God’s laws instructing his people to kill adulterers, those who turn you away from God, homosexuals, wayward children and more from the Old Testament. The Koran doesn’t have large sections of tolerant love to find comfort. Of course, one could argue that Christians do not really believe their scriptures wholly while Muslims do…. but that is a different blog.
Recently even well-known atheist Christopher Hitchens was physically attacked when debating Muslims from Damascus but described a Christian debate last week as being thrust in a “Den of Lambs”. Dr. Hitchens was grateful and respected the collegial debate and respect of Christians as compared with Muslims. Yet, this was not always the case. Historically, Christians of every persuasion were very intolerant of differing views and the result was often death.

Animal- Assisted Therapy

Parent's Rights and Responsiblities

I have always been an avid supporter of parental rights. Yet, I have also worked and been involved in various settings that have tried my beliefs. We all want to believe parents have their children’s best interest in mind, but this is not always the case. I have been involved with many cases of horrific child abuse. I’ve know and even testified against a parent who killed their own child. I know of parents who have burned their children, kicked them across the room, molested them sexually or even sold them for drugs. There is no question that some parents should not have the right to raise children. However, what about the parents who are well meaning but their belief systems are unconventional, fundamentally religious or even cultic in nature? Should parents have the right to keep their children sequestered from the world, traditional education, traditional medicine or other established benefits of society? These questions are not easily answered. I just reviewed a court decision where a judge is forcing a divorcing couple to place their children in public school. See http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,509687,00.html. Many groups consider this an attack against homeschooling parents, but this decision was primarily to allow both parents to be equally influential to their children in a joint custody resolution. Others feel this was a just decision and limits the influence of a potentially mentally ill mother who has been brainwashed by a cult.
Parents should have the right to point their children in the direction they feel is best for them. However, I do not believe that parents should ignore other routes youth can travel as well. Teaching our children to think is paramount. Rather than simply teaching them what is holy and evil, teach them to be discerning, logical and use reason to identify solutions for themselves. Parents may have the right to teach or program creationism, intelligent design or religious faith to our children, but it is much better to educate them to use cognitive tools to discover these mysteries for themselves. There is nothing wrong with giving our children direction and our opinion on specific issues, but it is important to point out our own bias and the reasons why we made the decisions we have. To give glib, simplistic answers that are intellectually bankrupt are hurtful to our children. We need to give them the “Why” with the “What”. If we tell our children, that being a Baptist is important; we need to explain why. If our answers are simplistic and full of logical fallacies, we do a disservice to them. This form of training is not much different than the reports we hear of the indoctrination of hate from Islamic schools of Hamas or Hezbollah. Public schools are far from perfect, but they do expose us to others; people of different beliefs and different cultures. They allow us to give our children a different frame of reference than ourselves and help them discover answers for themselves rather than relying on parents or other authoritarian figures. When I try to find the truth, I don’t exclusively listen to people with whom I agree; instead I intentionally seek out those who make me think and challenge me. I still may come full circle, such as those beliefs handed down by my parents, but they are now my own. I think one of the saddest things in this world, is when people hold beliefs that are not their own. They have not been taught to listen, learn, and think and to take ownership and responsibility for their own views and destiny. While blindly believing and obeying in authority figures is easier, I believe many suffer or will suffer for their ignorance and laziness.

Public Prayer

Why do people pray aloud? Are they really praying to God or simply choosing words for “people” to hear. I know when I was asked to pray aloud, I prayed for human ears. I could not help but think about what others were thinking about me and my holiness. As much as I wanted to, I could never drown out those thoughts. I felt like a hypocrite every time I was asked to pray. Whenever someone asked me to pray, they were forcing me to be a charlatan. Sunday rituals were also to blame for forcing hypocrisy. Now, I know that I am very introspective and have a tendency to think these issues out a little too far, but I can’t help but believe that others may feel the same way. It was not that I was embarrassed to pray it was that I have always preferred to talk to God in a personal way and not formalized. I once was asked why I address my prayers to Jesus and not to God the father. I was rebuked for this once by my own father. Yet, I prefer to talk to God as someone who is real and understands me. It is sometimes difficult to talk to God, THE FATHER, in this manner. I have also never understood praying to the Spirit…. without a name, and only a title, it makes communication even more difficult.
I believe that even saying grace at a meal has become ritualized and void of meaning for most people. Are they truly thankful when they pray, thanking God for their food? I can still remember my grandfather’s prayers over the family meal. He had a long version and a short version of the same prayer. The short version went like this… “Lord, we thank thee for this food. Make it useful and nourishing to our bodies. We ask for Christ’s Sake… [He would click his tongue here] Amen”. Now, I might have forgotten a line or two but it was practically the same at every meal. I loved my grandfather but I just can’t believe that he was praying to God but was praying for those present at the table. I believe he prayed (and many pray) before a meal as a ritual of thankfulness but not to truly talk to God. I also believe he memorized and ritualized his prayers not for God but because he was a quiet, almost shy man and didn’t want to mess up on a spontaneous public prayer. To screw up a public prayer before God is unthinkable. But… Why? When I pray, God understands and doesn’t condemn me. And that is the point. If we are truly afraid of making a mistake in our public prayer, this is a sign we are not praying to God but to people.
I believe another sign of fake prayers are when we change our English to the Victorian Times. We put in the thees and thous because we want to impress people, not God. If God can hear our thoughts, why would we revert to an unused language? I just don’t understand this. I believe that if we should pray, we should do it alone and not in public. I have no desire to impress people with my eloquent prayers and turning into a hypocrite which I loathe in myself. There is nothing more I hate about myself than when I am not genuine, a hypocrite or a fraud. I want to be myself… the good, the bad and the ugly. If God, and others, cannot accept me for who I am (faults and all), then they do not really love me.
And one last thought… If we pray to impress others and are not talking to God… are we not speaking God’s name in vain?

The Bible and Bullets

When I heard the story about the pastor that was shot and killed this week, I was moved to tears. Senseless killing of innocent victims is always difficult to me for several reasons. They are as follows:
1. The sovereignty of God
2. The belief that there is a reason for everything
3. The need for people to confirm their own belief system and look for miracles
The Rev. Fred Winters was killed by a mentally ill gunman who opened fire at the First Baptist Church outside St Louis Mo. Rev. Winters was later pronounced dead at a hospital. He was a married father of two children and appeared to be a very good man who loved people and dedicated his life to God and his work. There was also another incident this week where a man went on a shooting spree in the south and randomly shot and killed several innocent people. He was determined to kill some individuals but his bullets were also going at random, once killing a mother, her 18mo. Child and wounded another child who was a young baby. The father, who was a police officer, was devastated that his family was almost wiped-out through this random act of violence. And then there were the other killings in Germany.
Were these acts, random? Did God guide the bullets? Or did God have nothing to do with the guidance of the bullets? I cannot believe that God had anything to do with these individuals being killed. I do not accept that God wanted these people killed in such a violent way. I also cannot accept that he would do this with purpose. If God had a purpose, then God would be no better than other monsters in our history who willingly sacrificed others to fulfill an alleged greater purpose. I do not believe that when People say that God has a purpose behind this form of hate and terror, they make God no better than Hitler. Under man’s own law (and I would believe that God’s morals and ethics would be higher than our minimum standards), God would be guilty of crimes against humanity.
I have heard about every argument from others to justify this dilemma (which, in reality, is the old problem of evil) but I have really never heard a logical argument that is truly compelling. The “God’s permissive will and perfect will argument doesn’t hold water. When I talked about this to someone close to me, His argument is that death isn’t that big of a deal. That the death of this pastor, the mother and the child and others only gives them a gold ticket to heaven. Of course, he would also believe that only a few are going to heaven, so most would be drawing the short straw to Hell instead of getting the gold ticket to heaven. And what of those who do not die, but are raped, tortured, and left with physical and emotional scars that will never heal? Not everyone who suffers dies. Did God plan and carry out his will in these cases? I can easily understand when someone dies or is maimed due to their own stupidity. Examples are those who receive the Darwin awards… just Google this if you want to know more. However, I cannot believe that a child deserves to be raped or raviged by a painful cancer.
So is there a purpose behind everything that happens? Absolutely Not! Those who believe this must hide their head in the sand because some incidents like those mentioned above just do not have a purpose. What about other natural disasters? It is hard to justify that God wanted some people dead and some to miss that fate. Now, this does not mean that people cannot find purpose, but if God was to kill children to carry out his purpose, then God is cruel and is not worthy of worship. I was once told that it was God’s will that Adam Walsh was molested, killed and decapitated because he wanted his father to start the TV program, America’s Most Wanted which has done great things. Here is an example where a man found purpose in a tragedy but if he would have done that to his own child to do something noble, we would think he would be a ghastly monster of a man, worthy of prison, punishment, death and eternal hellfire. Yet, we think God would do this and that he should be worshiped for such behavior because his ways are so above us and we cannot simply understand the full purposes of God. Nonsense! If God cannot stand under his own biblical principles, the universal understanding of right and wrong, the morality and ethics that are written on the conscience of us all, then why should we worship him? I believe in God but I have had to reevaluate the concept of God that others have given to me.
I wonder what would have happened if all of the bullets would have been deflected by the bible instead of one going directly into the heart of the pastor? I can tell you exactly what would have happened… every church in America would have their message for next Sunday. The sermon would be about being shielded by the word of God, how it protects, and preserves. People would have talked about it being a miracle about how God saved the pastor. A man firing at a pastor with a large bible in front of him is not a miracle but that is exactly what people would have called it. Yet, one bullet met its mark and the miracle claim was also killed.
I am so sick and tired of people claiming miracles, only to forget about the others who suffered. This belief is so egocentric and hurtful to others who wonders why they were not saved and why God chose them to suffer and why he spared others. Since, we look for meaning, many believe that God is punishing them or is against them, instead of one who loves them.
Some are reading this with all of the answers. I used to have all the answers. In my piety, I told many how I knew the answers and gave them the simple solutions that they just needed to believe, have faith or trust God. However, these issues cannot be rationalized. To make God the author of this type of evil ignores common sense, makes God break hi s own standards and paints for others an image of God that is revolting.
The first questions above are for logic and faith to figure out; the last question is for science. I do not believe there are magical powers in the printed bible. The Discovery Channel’s Mythbusters once took up the challenge of the urban legend about pocket bibles stopping bullets. Numerous stories claim that people have been saved by the miraculous power of a pocket bible stopping a speeding bullet. The story has been told to thousands, which has resulted in hundreds of souls being saved as well. The Mythbusters concluded from their experiment that anything larger than a 22cal bullet would easily go through a 400page pocket Bible (Quran or Tom Sawyer – it doesn’t matter) and potentially kill the individual.
People have a tendency to use only those stories that support their argument. People will hear about the 2007 story of private Schweigart’s and how a pocket bible may have stopped a bullet which entered from his side and went under his body armor. They will claim this to be a miracle but ignore this week’s case where the Bible didn’t shield all bullets and the pastor died from his wounds. If we are to test miracle claims we must look at statistics and probability, natural causes and empirical experimentation. For this reason, I cannot believe in miracles in today’s world. For me, a miracle is when something happens outside of natural law. This does not include something out of the ordinary that naturally occurs through chance. Raising a person, who has been dead for several days, is a miracle. A person, whose heart stopped and is revived within a few minutes, is not a miracle. Praying over a man who lost a limb, then watching a new limb grow were the old one was, is a miracle. A woman with chronic pain, no longer feeling pain, is not a miracle. To test whether there are true miracles in the world today, we must first define our terms and test our hypothesis.

Metaphor gone awry

Dawn discussed with me an issue regarding a birthday present for Danae. Danae wants a costume for her birthday and I believe it is a complete waste of money. Dawn wants to give Danae what she wants. So we disagreed. Well, Danae texted Dawn on her phone about the costume while Danae was surrounded by her friends. Dawn responded to Danae that she had gotten Dawn in hot water with her dad (me). Danae had not heard that metaphor before and assumed that she had literally texted Dawn when we were both having and good hot bath together. This went over well with her friends.

Grandma in the Lion's Den

I am reflecting on my grandparents; specifically my grandma and grandpa Wesley. Although I was born in Kentucky, my family soon relocated to Arizona where I spent most of my youth. My grandma and grandpa would often visit us in Arizona; sometimes spending months nearby. They loved to experience life, see things and do things. They seemed to always own a camper that sat on the back of their truck or a trailer that they would pull long distances. They looked forward to their adventures until they were involved in an auto accident or two and their age would no longer allow them to travel. As I look back, it seemed that they both enjoyed these adventures equally. Grandma liked the city, Grandpa liked the farm but both liked adventure. They did not let money to prevent them from enjoying themselves. They were very thrifty but they still had fun.

I remember doing several things with them. Often my grandparents would take my brother and me camping, shopping, or to visit major attractions. They took us camping all of the time. Most often we would go to Payson, Arizona or on the Mogollon Rim but we also camped out in a desert location or even spent the night in their camper in our back yard. Sometimes my mother and baby sister would join us in these adventures. We went to see amusement parks in Gatlinburg, Tennessee or a Country Music park in Kentucky. On one of these trips, we met Barbra Mandrel before she became so big and had a variety show with her sisters. I remember going up in a ski lift with them and seeing a groundhog below us. I also remember when we got back to the truck and camper, someone put a bottle under a tire and it caused us to have a flat. They took us at least twice to Cumberland Falls, Shaker Town and to City zoos. I wish my children had spent as much time with their grandparents doing special things.

They took pictures wherever they would go. They didn’t have a very good camera. In fact, it was just a cheap Kodak Instamatic. I wish I could go back in time and give them a good quality camera. They often would have their pictures made into projector slides. Grandma would love to show their slides to family, friends and even the church. I’m sure they also watched these slides at home because they loved to relive their adventures.

When I was a young boy… I don’t remember how old; probably eight or ten, I remember going to the Phoenix zoo with my grandparents. I believe my mother was there with us and baby Christy was in a stroller. We walked through half of the park and came to the lion and tiger exhibits. Most of the time the animals in zoos rarely give you a good show. Often, animals are hiding or sleeping but not today. Today the large male lion was making some noise and roaring at the crowd. My grandma pulled out her camera and started moving closer to the lion exhibit. What she didn’t see, because she had the camera on the lion, was that she was walking toward a sloped flower and shrubbery bed that was faced with railroad ties. Grandma tripped on these ties and fell straight down into this lowered shrubbery bed beside the lions area. Grandma was now head first, wearing a dress and her legs lifted in the air. All the while, the lion becomes louder and louder with his roars and grandma is screaming, thinking she just fell in the lion’s den and she is now on the menu. My grandpa was trying to help my grandma up but he was trying to keep her dress closed at the same time. Quickly with the help of some other zoo patrons, my grandmother was lifted out of the bed. She was disoriented and scratched up from the shrubs but soon saw that her fear of being a lion burger was unfounded. Later, she could see the humor in the incident and would laugh at the incident. I should also mention that grandma got a good picture of the lion before she went down!

Reflection on the Faith of a Child

I remember attending a viewing and funeral of an elderly person when I was young. I do not remember much about the funeral itself, but I still remember seeing this nice lady’s dead body, lying in front of me in a casket only a few feet away. I sat there sad for the woman that I cared about but also intrigued at not seeing a dead body before. I was a boy who read and understood much of the Bible. I knew the stories of the Bible better than most adults teaching Sunday school. I memorized all of the great stories, all of the kings of Israel, Judah and much, much more. I really did live what I believed. Now I was sitting before this dead woman, thinking of several passages about faith. I knew that if only I believed, had faith in God, and asked him to make my friend rise from the dead, it would happen. I looked around at everyone, then I bowed my head. I prayed to God to put life back into this woman and I truly believed it could happen. Sure, I had doubts, but looking back, my faith was more than a mustard seed, it was a huge walnut sized seed. I lifted my head, honestly expecting a miracle. I prepared myself for everyone in the room to be freaked out but for me it was an expectation. I looked for signs of life. I didn’t know if this new life given this woman was going to go through her like a wave, causing her to convulse and jump out of the coffin or if she would just gradually move a finger or two which would slowly move throughout her body. But… I did have faith. I believed. I had the faith of a child because I was a child.

Time passed and I continued to wait. Nothing happened. We sang, we prayed and people spoke about Ms. Goldie, but no signs of life. She was still dead.

As we drove home, I blamed myself. I felt guilty that I must have not had enough faith, and in some strange childish way, I was to blame for her continued death.

Later, I would learn to rationalize why she did not come to life, which would help to reduce the guilt I once held. For example, I would learn that everything we ask for must first be God’s will before he would grant a request. However, I thought it was always God’s will that all would not suffer and would live without pain and suffering. I also thought that everyone would praise God and some would believe in him if Goldie would come to life. I had a hard time thinking of the negatives of her coming to life. The only reason I rationalized, other than my lack of faith, that God didn’t answer my prayer was that she liked it in heaven and bringing her back to earth would not be her wish especially since she may have been in heaven with her husband who died years before.

Christian Hate

When I saw on the internet that some alleged Christians were attempting a protest at the funeral of Chad Gilliam I became livid. Go to the link at… http://www.westborobaptistchurch.com/written/fliers/20090108_chadwick-gilliam-memorial.pdf to see more.

I am sickened that people call themselves Christians and can show such hatred. This maybe an extreme example of detestable behavior coming from those who say they are the elect of God, but this type of hatred is not uncommon. I do not want to underestimate the good that many Christians are doing today, but I am sickened by the hate and venom I see in much of the Christian community. Over the last few years, my eyes have been opened to the lack of Christlike behavior from those who espouse to be the only ones who know the truth. Yet, I see such pride, prejudice, bitterness and hatred in many of their lives. What happened to the fruit of the Spirit… Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self Control? Can’t they see their behavior as everyone else sees it? Do they really think that they are Fooling God? Who would want to follow their message of salvation? They are turning people away from God’s message of love. They continue to believe God somehow favored them before the foundation of the world to interpret God’s message correctly and believe correctly. They believe that since they followed the correct path on the Romans Road, they are safe and special. They believe God only looks at whether they followed the correct belief system and in the correct order. They are not concerned with loving actions toward human beings made in the image of God. They believe that behavior such as caring for the sick, dying of aids or feeding the hungry is irrelevant in God’s plan. The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man is he who listens to counsel. Proverbs 12:15.

The Puppy

Our family had a rough couple of days. Friday morning was the coldest day in a decade and I was getting ready to take Danae to school. I started the truck to get it warmed up. Danae and I got in the car and started backing up out of the driveway. Unfortunately, I did not know Danae’s little puppy, Phillip, got out of the house and was running after her. I heard the yelp and we both knew what happened. Danae screamed and went outside the vehicle only to see her poor puppy still partially under the wheel. I move the vehicle and got out and picked up the pup. We were both distraught. I knew the puppy could not survive. We both held the puppy and I went inside to yell for Dawn to take care of Danae will I attended to the pup. Dawn quickly attempted to comfort Danae. I went to the bathroom and got a towel to cradle the pup and cover his injury so Danae would not be more disturbed. I knew the puppy could not live but didn’t want him to suffer for long. I pulled out my pistol and put it in my pocket, just in case, I had to do the unbearable. I still remember the gun going off in the background when my dad had to put our dog down when I was younger.  I know Danae will never forget this tragic morning but I didn’t want her to remember a gunshot in the background. Within a few more minutes, however, I could see that little Phillip was not going to live long. I took him downstairs and asked Danae if she wanted to say goodbye to him. I am an emotional man and just cannot stand to see people in pain. Seeing my daughter in pain is unbearable to me. We were both crying when he took his final breaths.

It was not a good day but after a couple of days, things are getting back to normal. I look back on that morning with a lump in my throat because of the emotional pain our family was experiencing. I was also hurting because I could easily blame myself for this misfortune. However, in the midst of our pain, when Danae was crying she continued to say repeatedly to me… “Don’t blame yourself dad, it wasn’t your fault.”

Often when we are sad or angry, we often have a tendency to lash out at the ones we love. We often say hurtful things… using words that cut like and knife… causing wounds that may never fully heal. That morning, I saw my youngest daughter experiencing one of the most traumatic events of her young life, seeing her puppy dying under the car. Yet, instead of blaming God, others or me for the tragedy, her instantaneous emotional response was to ease my pain. WOW! I am truly blessed. Danae lost her cute puppy that morning but she gained additional respect from her father. I am very proud of all of my daughters. They are growing into very fine young women. Dawn and I often reflect if we have been good parents to our children. When I see Danae, Brittany and Destiny, thinking of others, I know we must have done something right. 

Chad Gilliam

I joined the faculty of Lindsey Wilson College in the fall of 2006. I remember how special the pinning ceremony was in Prestonsburg. It was very special to me because the moment was so special to the students, their family and to the community. It was also when I saw Dr. Mary Kloth who was going through extensive chemotherapy. I had only met Dr. Kloth a few months before during my interview as a faculty candidate. Now I have been notified that a graduate student, Chad Gilliam, who was there at that ceremony was just killed in action in Iraq. He joined the Marine Corp after graduation to help pay off his student loans. This is a great loss for his family, Eastern Kentucky and to our Lindsey Wilson College, SPC family. My thoughts and prayers go out to his family. For more information see http://www.lindsey.edu/index.cgi?id=17689

Addiction and Weight Loss

As many of you know (or will know soon) I love the Field of addiction treatment. I love to teach about addiction and love to work with individuals struggling with it. I do not believe it is a disease or that we are powerless but a matter of positive strategies and hard work to overcome our difficulties. Well, it is my turn to act on what I believe. I am just plain fat and want to loss some weight. I am currently 225lbs and need to lose at least 35lbs. Therefore, my present goal is 190lbs. I hope to be there by July 1st. 

Food addiction is one of the hardest, if not the hardest, addiction for anyone to overcome. One cannot abstain from food. Food is all around us. Just like drugs, it makes us happy, satisfied, fulfilled, and helps us escape. I need all of the support and accountability as I can get. I will keep everyone posted on my progress.

Ethics

I am preparing to teach ethics this semester. I am reflecting on when I was a younger man, I had all the answers. I knew what was right and what was wrong... and not just for myself but everyone else as well. Now that I am getter older, and hopefully much wiser, I realize how much I do not know. Isn't it funny that as we grow older, we realize our limitations and see the world differently. As a young Christian man, everything was black and white. Now, I can see nearly every side to an argument. I was once very conservative, had no doubts about God, the Bible and believed things were simple and without many gray areas. Now I see the world much different. I am now trying to see the world more logically and with more compassion for people. It is my hope, that instead of falling away from my values and morals, I am now embracing them more fully. Instead of treating people as ungodly sinners, I am trying to see them as being made in the image of God. Instead of looking for the rules, I am trying to live by my principles and values. Instead of looking for what I should do, I am looking for what I should be.